Extending the hibernation

why do I still feel tired, no bandwidth and motivation to do stuff? but still able to “go pro”, show up, and do my day job — killing it as well. but I’m just left with no energy or interest to do the other non-work stuff like writing and side hustles. even family tim, and…

How are you doing?

(September 2019 at Ladies View, Ring of Kerry, Ireland) Summary of points in this post: Life is great right now but I feel guilty for feeling content. Questioned the idea of comfort zone. Are we really ever comfortable? Disillusioned: apparently I don’t enjoy the things I thought I’d love to do. I don’t want to…

Ask, ask, ask

Started asking myself these questions more and more lately: how many things can I get if I just ask? how many miscommunication can I avoid by asking? how many problems can I solve more easily if I just ask for help? what questions am I avoiding asking? what wants am I avoiding sharing? what needs…

Life Cheatsheet

I can sum up the past three years of my life into three core themes: The world makes a lot more sense. Gaining a more complete description of reality. I’ve come to understand myself a lot better. Noticing and disarming the unconscious mechanisms preventing me from experiencing and seeing reality as it is. Life is…

Saya bergidik ketika ada orang yang mengatakan saya menginspirasi mereka.

Kemarin mendadak saya ingin berbagi sudut pandang saya yang hidup dengan disabilitas. Pemicunya adalah saya dikirimi buku auto biografi dari Pak Budi Seputro, pemilik rumah makan Sate Ratu di Jogja. Dalam satu bagian kecil dalam bukunya, beliau menceritakan pengalamannya ngobrol dengan tamu-tamunya, salah satunya saya. Beliau mengaku terkesan dengan semangat saya dan bagaimana saya terlihat…

Oops I Did It Again: How Burnout Hit Me One More Time

March 1st 2019: Gave an internal company-wide talk titled “Stay Sane While Working Remotely”. Talked about mental health awareness, tactics, best practices, encouraged conversation, and let people know it’s ok to ask for help. March 11th 2019: Hit a low week, all drained of mental energy. Kept it to myself, postponed asking for help for…

663 days of journaling

I have been writing 750+ words per day for the past 663 days. Here are some things I learned: I think in text. I need to trap my thoughts in text. I cannot process my thoughts without seeing them as words. Initially I wrote and edit at the same time. I censored, restructured, rephrased and…

My experiment with time tracking

I’ll share one (probably) weird thing with you today. I have been keeping track of my time, down to the minutes since July. I use this app and have these categories set up for different activities: Exercise Meal Sleeping Consuming – NIANU Consuming – Book SH work Non SH work Grooming Journaling Family Social Music Break…

Your built-in software

Whoa. I paused for what felt like 1 full second in the middle of my home-alone cardio session on the stairs and said out loud. I was listening to an interview with Annie Duke on The Knowledge Project where she told a story about trying to order food at a Chinese restaurant. Trying to explain…

Stuff I am still wondering about

Spanduk harga2 promo mingguan yg di Alfa, Indo, Carrefour, dll itu mereka nyetak sendiri atau gmn. How many of my desires are actually strategies and proxy for wanting to hit a pause button on the constant stream of demand and responsibilities in le adult life. How do you know when you are thinking vs when…